It Takes a Village: Take Your Role Seriously

Artwork by: Larry Brown, “Sowing Seeds”

As a single 30-something woman with no kids, I’m constantly asked, “When are you going to settle down and have kids?”. Or some other passive-aggressive way of encouraging me to reproduce before I “get them old eggs”. (P.S. Angela Bassett has ten-year-old twins…chill).


My response to these questions/statements is simple… “I already have kids”. I’m Auntie, Tee-Tee, and G-Mama. And I’m helping mold these children into functional, productive members of society. I have kids who I may have not created, but I damn sure impact.

I feel their eyes watching me as closely as their own mothers, soaking up every joke and gesture, longing one day to take a seat on the thrones we currently possess. You as a woman, in whatever role–mother, aunt; single, married—are making the same impact on the children in your village. Nieces. Play daughters. The cute little baby with the Lady Rage afro puffs in the checkout line. You owe it to the next generation to show them the power of black girl magic.


It takes a village to grow that magic that is innately born in our beautiful black and brown children. What you see, you become. Young black princes and princesses can only become the kings and queens they see. It’s rarely present in the media that bombards them on cell phones and tablets. It’s up to you to put some spit shine on those crowns and show these babies what real queens do.


Queens compliment other queens, modeling to our princesses; that there’s more joy in supporting each other than tearing each other down.

Queens show princesses’ we can have it all: successful careers, healthy relationships and individual joy, without compromising or changing who they are and what they believe.

Queens inspire those around them to be their best and pursue their passions in life; uplifting, motivating and supporting through both words and actions.
We have to be better so our next generations of queens can be better. The status of the next generation’s kingdom is incumbent upon the example we set today. I challenge you to take your crowns off the shelves, place them on your beautifully coiled heads and leave a mark that will vibrate long after you’re gone.


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